Derailed (2002) Reviews

• Bad. Very bad. Very very bad.

  BroadswordCallinDannyBoy2004-06-01

  The headline says it all. From atrocious action scenes to pathetic sound, from worse than amateur special effects to pathetic editing this film just plain bad. No other way of putting it. It throws one over used cliché after another, along with bad acting, and horrendous direction. It tries to be a big action film but with its sets and design, but it all looks so fake and ridiculous that you'll feel ripped off, even if you saw this movie for free. The "story" is about the theft of a deadly virus, which was stored in some guy's desk and it looks like an over the counter pain medicine, by a lady thief who must be escorted to safety from a bunch of stupid terrorists. Van Damme is assigned to help her. Throw in some unnecessary family drama and you have this film in a nutshell. Avoid it. 1/10 Rated R: violence and profanity

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• A low budget cheapie that's quite dull to boot. The performances are a lone bright spot

  callanvass2013-11-15

  An agent named Jacques (Van Damme) is forced to do a job on his birthday, much to his family's chagrin. He boards a train to protect a woman named Galina Konstantin. Jacques gets a surprise visit from his family with a birthday surprise, but his wife thinks he's cheating with Galina. Terrorists hop on board with a deadly virus, which is unleashed. Jacques must not only save his marriage, but save everybody on board This comes across like a hybrid of Under Siege II & Cassandra's Crossing. This movie was once on the bottom 100. While it is pretty bad, I've seen MUCH worse and even worse Van Damme films (Second in Command & Black Eagle come to mind) the problem is that it's much too cheap and dull for its own good. The ending is filled with laughable stock footage, and I just cringed. It also has a pretty bad moment where Van Damme commandeers a motorbike, and rides it on top of the train. The only good action scene in this movie is a decent car chase scene in the beginning. They pad it with pointless scenes, such as a cowboy (John Bishop) and a hunk (Binky van Bilderbeek) shooting the breeze, and getting drunk in the process, which proves to me that not much thought was put into this movie. Don't expect much vintage Van Damage. He doesn't do many of his patented moves, and we even get the annoying split screen thing with a fight. Believe it or not, the acting is pretty good. Jean-Claude Van Damme may not do many fancy things, but he gives a solid performance. He's not phoning it in, and gives it his all. He makes for a great hero, and has an impressive emotional scene at the end. I've always been a huge supporter of his, and he's really improved with his acting over the years. Laura Harring is breathtakingly sexy. Her manipulative character was a highlight for me. Tomas Arana is rather bland, but effectively sleazy I suppose. He did an OK job as the villain. Kristopher Van Varenberg pulls these funny angry faces, and doesn't really convince, but he does a really neat spin kick at the beginning of the movie. Shades of his dad! Susan Gibney is pretty good as the wife. I liked her. Final Thoughts: I've seen it many times, because I'm such a huge Van Damme fan. I paid 30$ for it when I first got it (Seriously) That should tell you how big of a fan I am. I regret paying that much for it, but it needed to be a part of my collection. It's a terrible film for the most part. Don't do what I do. See it once if you're a huge Van Damme fan and then forget it even exists. 3.7/10

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• Skip it unless you are a serious Van Damme fan

  diggler_inc2002-10-16

  Why did Van Damme make this? Maybe he just had some free time or he agreed to make it if they let his son co-star. Hopefully we never see his son teaming up with him in another movie. On the DVD making-of-featurette, they brag about all the special effects. This movie contains the fakest looking helicopter I have ever seen. At the end all the helicopters are real but it is just stock footage from another movie. This movie is very similar to "Agent Red" with Dolph Lundgren except Derailed lacks the sense of humor.

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• Action packed with low budget

  ma-cortes2004-10-05

  The movie centers upon Van Damme and his family ( Susan Gibney as wife and his true son ). When in a train happens strange events Jean Claude is helped by a thief spy ( Laura Harring ). They'll have confront a villain(Tomas Arana) and henchmen who have obtained a lethal virus. In the confrontation the virus outbreaks originating the nightmare . The runtime film is adjusted : one hour and sixty minutes approx. , it's fast moving and enough bemusing . From the beginning to the end the action is unstoppable. In the motion picture there are suspense, emotions, shootouts, pursuits but with little budget , it's a B series movie with less money than Van Damme's previous films . The storyline is similarly written two films of the 70s and 90s : ¨Cassandra Crossing ( by George Pan Cosmatos )¨and ¨Under Siege 2 ¨ ( Geoff Murphy ), it rips off both movies. The picture is produced by 777 Films which is Van Damme's property. Also by ¨ Millenniun ¨ the production company in charge of Avi Lerner, Danny Lerner, Boaz Davison and Trevor Short who are making a lot of films in the 90s and 2000s, likeness to ¨Cannon¨(Menahem Golan and Yoran Globus) in the 80s. The flick will appeal to Van Damme enthusiast and action fans. Rating: 5/10 average

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• Makes Under Siege 2 look like Citizen Kane

  bob the moo2006-01-03

  Forced to conceal his real job from his family, international agent Jacques Kristoff tells them he is taking a train journey with a banking client where really he is escorting the beautiful Galina Konstantin and a biological weapons package to safety across the border. Regardless, his family surprise him on the train, thinking it will be a nice gesture and end up thinking he is having an affair. Before he can apologise and explain, terrorists led by the ruthless Mason Cole seize the train and start hunting for Galina and the virus. With his family in danger and the virus released on board, Jacques must not only stop the terrorists but do so before the Governent take the only available option to stop an outbreak. Ten years or so is quite a long time. About ten years ago I had just moved to England for the first time and started studying. Since then I've been married, divorced, bought a house, got several jobs and owned one very knackered car. But the mid-nineties must seem even longer ago for Van Damme because then he was having hits like Universal Soldier and Time Cop whereas by 2002 he had sunk to appearing in rubbish like this – not that he was ever a great star but this film is below even him. The plot is a basic rip off of Under Siege 2 crossed with Cassandra Crossing with any sense of fun, excitement or involvement skilfully removed by writers who between them are responsible for other classics include Octopus, Octopus 2: River of Fear (both Davidson) and Crocodile and Crocodile 2: Death Roll (both Anderson). It doesn't help that the man chosen to pull it all together as director is the man who made Shark Attack with lots of stock footage and no thrills. The plot is messy and pointless – people apparently die then return with no explanation, the action lacks logic and the whole virus thing is just daft. With this type of film this stuff usually can be forgotten if the action is slick and the film is fun to watch; Under Siege 2 is a good example – it is rubbish but I quite enjoyed it so I forgave it. However the action here is poor with basic, uninspiring fights and no real tension; when I saw Van Damme jumping around the train on a motorbike I felt like just turning it off in disgust. The supporting "actors" dying one the train did nothing to make me care one way or the other and the whole thing just felt cheap. The effects make this worse, being as they are a mix of rubbish computer effects or rubbish model work or a rubbish combination of both. The writing is clunky and full of dialogue that if even a horse spoke it your surprise at a speaking horse would come secondary to the annoyance you feel towards the unconvincing nature of his words. Already hamstrung by this the cast can do nothing to improve the situation; although many of the cast appear perfectly at home at this level. It speaks volumes that Van Damme is actually one of the best performances in the film; he is mean and tough in style – just a shame the action and dialogue are so poor that he can't do anything with it. The rest of the cast are so-so support. We have the tough baddie in a humourless and dour Arana, a sexy female co-star in Harring (who does fill the sexy requirement well), loads of European rent-a-thugs and a train load of hammy dying people including Gibney, Bowman, Van Varenberg (who can kick and can't act, hmmm) and the hilariously named Binky van Bilderbeek, who must have had a lot of fun in his fancy English school as a child. Overall this shambles is loaded with clichés, bad dialogue, bad direction, cheap effects and bad performances. Fun, excitement, humour, thrills and entertainment all got off at the last stop and nothing of value got on in its place. Even Van Damme fans will be turned off by this rubbish and it is only Steven Seagal fans that should be happy because it at least shows what an entertaining film Under Siege 2 really was.

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